I love standing in line outside the school for dismissal. Normally, our 5 year old sees me and bolts with a big hug in hand. He chatters all the way home about the wonderful day he's had and the new friends he's making and how the cute girls chased him. But I did say normally...
This past Friday was a completely different scene, because not only was I a few minutes late, but that time he spent waiting was unexpectedly filled with the horror of an older bully girl making threats to beat up our little guy! Why..? Well, after decoding Kindergarten lingo, we discovered it was because this particular girl (bully -- thankfully from another classroom) wants to be told she's the prettiest girl at school. Toby wouldn't say that to her, but he did go so far to say she was the same as the other pretty girls.... That not being what she wanted to hear, the threats pursued.
"Get used to that.." I trailed off with laughter, trying to make light of it. I wanted to go into detail about how girls are always going to get angry when they don't hear what they want to hear...but it doesn't mean you have to say what they want to hear if you don't believe its true... however, just then a second surge of tears burst through accompanied by moaning of how he was never going back to school again.
It's heart-retching to be greeted by a terrified little face with tears streaming down. As his sobbing increased, my 'mama-bear' emotions got the best of me. So instead it was, "No one is going to touch you. If anyone touches you they are going to have to deal with me! Mama will go in with you first thing on Monday and we'll talk to your teacher and make sure they know not to let anyone hurt you -- or else!!!.
A quick call to daddy, who reinforced everything and replaced the tears with giggling got us through the short ride home. You can imagine the outrage of protective big brother and sister...and grandma....when they heard the news. They all basically repeated what I said. Best friend Josh from next door came straight over when he heard the news and offered to beat the older girl up for him...but his mama put an end to that kind of talk. (But it did make us smile). Dad was home a few minutes after us and picked him up and convinced him to dry up his tears because daddy wasn't going to let anything happen to him. He now knows that female or male aggressor (if a girl's going to act like a boy then she'll be treated like one too in our book) we made it clear that it is always okay to protect himself and not allow others to walk on him.
As I expected, Monday morning arrived with a mysterious tummy ache. "I'm not well mommy. My tummy hurts. I can't go to school today." So I sat him up on the bed and spoke with him:
I love the part at the very end...when he says, "her brain's out of control and that's why she's trying to mess up my school year..." How many women have you met with a brain out of control trying to mess up your day! Hahaha!
Then, Ms. Pierce, being the Southern born and raised woman she is, said, "Emily, come over here please." (A sweet natured and confident little blond girl came up directly. ) "I want you to stay with Toby at recess and if you see anyone being mean to him you come and get me you hear? (Emily nodded yes) You're not going to let anything happen to Toby are you because you're not afraid of anyone, right." (Emily agreed pleasantly and trotted off.) Ms. Pierced looked at me and winked saying, "Emily's not afraid of anyone, she'll beat anyone up....."
With ego restored and the grasp at my leg a little less tighter, our little one was feeling better. However, when he saw me about to leave the class, tears welled up in his eyes all over again. Knowing that the last kind of woman I'd ever want to get in a brawl with was a Southern woman, (especially after the above conversation) I gave him a last dose of comfort that everything was going to be alright. I reminded him that everyone in his class loved him and he was going to have a great day.
Let's all have one. Why does drama start so early? Good grief!
Update: Toby came home and he and the little girl that was mean are "Best Recess Buddies" now....go figure.
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