Tuesday, June 15, 2010

What Would You Do?

What would you do, if you knew, there could be no chance to fail?  ~Author Unknown

I know that summer is only starting, but my mind seems to be terribly occupied with the thoughts of putting our youngest in Kindergarten.  It's true I've been through the emotions with each and every child on that infamous day...and that I've become old hat on everything from lunch packing, field trips and last minute 'spring on mom' science projects...but somehow putting the youngest in school is pulling way too hard at the heartstrings. With every day that passes I feel more trepidation towards it and the anxiety is eating me alive.  Just when you think you've got it all down, and nothing could surprise you.

Oldest & youngest x
I was picking out a birthday card for my step-dad today, and while I was browsing, my eyes hit the 'Wedding' section.  Trying to think ahead and be prepared for September, I thought I might grab a card now for our oldest. Standing there I was suddenly stepping out of the picture, looking in, and said quite clearly and slowly, "I'm standing here...in this shop...picking out a card...for my daughter's wedding day...I've NEVER done THIS before!"  I felt alarmed, and although there were some lovely cards that were very pretty and nicely decorated, none of them seemed right.  How could any of them possibly be good enough for this day?  

I kept trying and without noticing, I had crept over to the sympathy section -- which suddenly did seem like the right card (for me) -- and had to walk away from the whole colorful shelving at that point to avoid blubbering in front of everyone.

Oh well.  I'll have to try again on another day when I'm feeling a little more confident in this wonderful, strange and ever changing family.  Standing in line at the check out  -- there was yet another stand of cards.  But these were cards of quotes and encouragement -- which I obviously needed.  One stood out in particular to me;

What would you do, if you knew, there could be no chance to fail?  ~Author Unknown

As I stood there waiting in line, I thought perhaps (as my husband always says) I worry too much about the future.   About too much that might go wrong.  Then visions of Doris Day singing Que Sera Sera flashed before me and I was once again fighting back tears.

Got 'Thumbs Up' from man when taking pic
Once again composed, (and after a nice lunch with a very close friend) I began the drive home and sure enough, it didn't take long for my mind to wander and worry.   But there sitting in front of me, painted on the back of a truck, was yet another statement (click on pic to read).  I think perhaps it's time to start letting go a wee bit, and give way to the word trust

I am very thankful for my family.  What would I do with all my time, if I couldn't spend 99% of it worrying for them all.

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